Is it permissible not to shave the pubic hair, because my wife enjoys it more when having intercourse? What is the ruling on that?
Firstly:
Shaving the pubic hair is one of the sunnahs of the fitrah (natural sound human incinations) that are encouraged in Islam, and all religious laws are agreed on that. Al-Bukhari (5890) and Muslim (261) narrated from Ibn `Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Part of the fitrah is shaving the pubic hair, cutting the nails and trimming the moustache.”
The Sunnah indicates that it is not permissible to leave that for more than forty days, as Muslim (258) narrated that Anas ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him) said: A time limit was set for us for trimming the moustache, cutting the nails, plucking the armpit hairs and shaving the pubes: that was not to be left for more than forty days.
Ash-Shawkani (may Allah have mercy on him) said: The favoured view is that it is limited to within forty days, as stated by the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), so he should not leave it beyond that. If someone does not cut it and the like after it grows long, up until that time period ends, he is not regarded as going against the Sunnah.
End quote from Nayl al-Awtar, 1/143.
Based on that, you can refrain from shaving the pubic hair for no longer than forty days; as for leaving it longer than forty days, that is not permissible.
What is required of the Muslim is to respect the rulings of Allah, may He be Exalted, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):
{That [has been commanded], and whoever honors the sacred ordinances of Allah - it is best for him in the sight of his Lord}
[al-Hajj 22:30]
{And whoever honors the symbols of Allah - indeed, it is from the piety of hearts}
[al-Hajj 22:32].
It is very strange that a woman would enjoy her husband not being clean and resembling animals, let alone going against Islamic teachings, reason and sound human nature. One of the objectives of the characteristics of the fitrah (which include shaving the pubic hair) is physical cleanliness and caring for the feelings of other people. Al-Hafiz Ibn Hajar (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Fat-h al-Bari:
Spiritual and worldly interests are connected to these characteristics of the fitrah, as may be understood by reflecting on them. One of those interests is looking good and cleaning the body thoroughly, to make sure that your ghusl and wudu’ are valid, and to show consideration to the people you mix with and to your companions, by refraining from bothering them with unpleasant smells, and to be different from the disbelievers, namely the Zoroastrians, Jews, Christians and idol worshippers, and to comply with the command of Allah and maintain what is referred to in the verse (interpretation of the meaning): {and [Allah] formed you and perfected your forms} [at-Taghabun 64:3], because following these instructions is connected to the meaning of this verse. It is as if it was said: as your outward forms have been made beautiful, do not distort them with that which makes them ugly, or: keep to that which helps you to maintain your beauty. Maintaining it is maintaining one’s dignity and attaining harmony with others, because if a person looks good, it makes people feel at ease with him, so they will accept what he says and his advice and opinions will be well received, and the converse is also true.
So you must advise your wife to go back to her sound nature and respect the rulings of Islam. She should be certain that Allah, may He be Exalted, has prescribed these rulings for the believers so that they may attain thereby happiness in this world and the hereafter, and it is not possible that anything else could be equal to them or better than them. Allah, may He be Exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):
{Then is it the judgement of [the time of] ignorance they desire? But who is better than Allah in judgement for a people who are certain [in faith]}
[al-Ma’idah 5:50].
In other words: no one is better in judgement than Allah, may He be Exalted.
Whoever thinks that something other than the judgement of Allah is better than the judgement of Allah, let him check his faith.
We ask Allah for well-being.
