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23,37613/05/2010

His mother wants him to study medicine and he wants to enter the business field

Question: 147294

My mother wants me to enter medical field and I want to enter business field. However, she says that she inst pleased with this decision and that because she inst pleased with me Allah will not help me succeed. Is this true? Isnt what I want to major in, in college my choice? I find her being very unreasonable when i tried talking to her in the most best manner, but i couldnt hold the anger i had from her saying some really obscene things like, no woman will marry me for entering in this unrewarding field(according to her). I told her Allah is the razaaq and that inshallah I will be able to support myself, because Allah decides who will be rich and who will be poor. What do you think dear Sheikh? Will Allah really not help me succeed in my life because my mother prefers i be a doctor than a man working in the business field?.

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon the Messenger of Allah and his family.

The mother’s rights over her son are great; he is required
to honour her and treat her kindly as enjoined by Allah in many places in
His Book and as enjoined by His Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be
upon him). 

Hence you should try to convince her of the advantages of the
field to which you are inclined and want to enter and in which you feel that
you are able to succeed. 

This is something that some fathers and mothers neglect. They
look at the beauties of the specialty or profession but they do not look at
how suited the son is for it or his desire to succeed in it. The son may
have no desire to study medicine for example, or he may feel that he has no
need for it or it is not possible for him to excel in it. Yet despite that
his parents insist that he should study medicine. This destroys real talents
and contributes to increasing the numbers of graduates who are not fully
qualified in their specialty. 

The son is not obliged to obey his parents in choosing a
specialty to study or a field of work, just as he is not obliged to eat what
he does not like or marry someone who he does not want. 

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him)
said: The parents have no right to force their son to marry someone who he
does not want, and he is not disobeying them in that case; the same applies
to eating food he does not want.

End quote from al-Ikhtiyaaraat, p. 304 

As he is not obliged to obey them in eating what he does not
want, even though the hardship involved does not last more than a brief
period of time, it is more appropriate that he should not be obliged to obey
them with regard to study which will take years and on which years of
further work will be based, when he has no interest in doing that. 

What you have to do is strive hard to please your mother and
make her feel good, and prove that you can excel and succeed in the field of
business and commerce. 

We ask Allah to guide and help you. 

And Allah knows best.

Source

Islam Q&A

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