The reward of one whose child dies and he bears that with patience

There are many texts in the Qur’aan and Sunnah which point to
the virtue and great reward of those who are patient and state that Allaah
will give them reward without measure. This includes everyone who bears with
patience any calamity with which he is tested. Undoubtedly the loss of a
child is one of the greatest calamities for the one whom it befalls. Whoever
bears that with patience and accepts the will and decree of Allaah will have
a great reward by the grace and bounty of Allaah. There follow some of these
texts, which we hope will be of consolation to you in your time of
calamity: 

Allaah says (interpretation of the meanings): 

“And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear,
hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-
Saabiroon (the patient).

Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: ‘Truly, to Allaah
we belong and truly, to Him we shall return.’

They are those on whom are the Salawaat (i.e. who are
blessed and will be forgiven) from their Lord, and (they are those who)
receive His Mercy, and it is they who are the guided ones”

[al-Baqarah 2:155-157]

“And Allaah loves As-Saabiroon (the patient)”

[Aal ‘Imraan 3:146] 

“Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in
full, without reckoning”

[al-Zumar 39:10]

And there are many similar verses. 

There are also many ahaadeeth, including the following: 

Muslim (5318) narrated that Suhayb said: The Messenger of
Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “How wonderful
is the affair of the believer, for his affair is all good, and this applies
to no one except the believer. If something good happens to him, he gives
thanks and that is good for him, and if something bad happens to him, he
bears it with patience, and that is good for him.” This has to do with the
virtues of patience in general. 

There are also ahaadeeth which speak specifically of losing a
child. For example: 

Al-Tirmidhi (942) narrated that Abu Sinaan said: I buried my
son Sinaan and Abu Talhah al-Khoolaani was sitting at the graveside. When I
wanted to go out he took my hand and said, “Shall I not give you some glad
tidings, O Abu Sinaan?” I said, “Yes.” He said, “Al-Dahhaak ibn ‘Abd
al-Rahmaan ibn ‘Arzab narrated to me from Abu Moosa al-Ash’ari that the
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“When a person’s child dies, Allaah says to His angels, ‘You have taken the
child of My slave.’ They say, ‘Yes.’ He says, ‘You have taken the apple of
his eye.’ They say, ‘Yes.’ He says, ‘What did My slave say?’ They say, ‘He
praised you and said “Innaa lillaahi wa inna ilayhi raaji’oon (Verily
to Allaah we belong and unto Him is our return).’ Allaah says, ‘Build for My
slave a house in Paradise and call it the house of praise.’” 

(Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in al-Silsilah al-Saheehah,
1408) 

It was narrated in al-Saheehayn that there is a
special reward for the person whose child dies but he bears that with
patience and hopes for reward. It was narrated from Abu Sa’eed (may Allaah
be pleased with him) that the women said to the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Give us a day (to teach us),” So he
preached to them and said, “Any woman who loses three of her children, they
will be a shield for her against the Fire.” A woman said, “And two?” He
said, “And two.” 

(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 99; Muslim, 4786) 

According to a report narrated by al-Bukhaari (1292), Anas
ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no Muslim
who loses three of his children before they reach the age of puberty, but
Allaah will admit him to Paradise by virtue of His Mercy towards them.” 

These ahaadeeth explain that if two or more of a person’s
children die and he bears that with patience, then he is promised Paradise
and salvation from the Fire. 

Our Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
taught us a du’aa’ to say at times of calamity, in which there is virtue and
great reward. Muslim narrated in his Saheeh (1525) that Umm Salamah
said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) say, “There is no Muslim who is afflicted with a calamity and says
that which Allaah has enjoined, Innaa lillaahi wa inna ilayhi raaji’oon.
Allaahumma ajurni fi museebati wakhluf li khayran minha (Verily to
Allaah we belong and unto Him is our return. O Allaah, reward me for my
calamity and compensate me with something better than it), but Allaah will
compensate him with something better than it.” She said, When Abu Salamah
died, I said, who among the Muslims is better than Abu Salamah, the first
household to migrate to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him)? Then I said these words, and Allaah compensated me with
the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). 

We ask Allaah to bless you with patience in the face of your
loss, and to compensate you with something better. And Allaah knows best.