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Consolation for a mother whose son has passed away

Question: 2226

My 17 year old son passed away last month. I would like to say some doas
and prayers for him but do not know how. Do I say the doa in my daily prayers or just read
the Quran as a gift for him? What I mean is how can I help him as a mother? My father also
passed away quite some time now and what do I do to help him. I am so ignorant on this. I
read that a child’s prayer for his parents is good but what of a mother to the deceased
child especially one who is not married and with no children to doa for him.
Please enlighten me on this. Thank
you and wassalam.

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon the Messenger of Allah and his family.

How can your duaa (prayer,
supplication) not be answered and not be of benefit to your son, when the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) has
said: There are three duaas which will undoubtedly
be answered: the duaa of one who is oppressed, the duaa
of a traveller, and the duaa of a parent for his child?
(Reported by Ibn Maajah, 3852; see also Saheeh al-Jaami,
no. 3033). The word parent [waalid, lit. father] includes both
father and mother. You are his mother, who bore him, nursed him, fed him and
brought him up. You are more compassionate towards him than all his other relatives,
and you are the one who has suffered the most grief and distress because of
his loss. Pray for him for forgiveness, mercy, Paradise and salvation from the
Fire. Pray for him in your salaat and your sujood (prostration), in the last
third of the night and on Fridays before sunset, and at all other times and
in all other circumstances.

Be of good cheer and remember the great reward which will be
yours if you bear this loss with patience, accept the will and decree of Allaah,
and hope for reward. You have lost your child to One Who is more compassionate
towards him than you, the Most Merciful, the Most Compassionate, Allaah, the
Lord of the Worlds. You also have the consolation of knowing that if you and
he die believing in Tawheed and in Islam, you will be reunited after death.
The righteous will be reunited with their offspring in Paradise, even if they
are of a lesser status than them. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
And those who believe and whose offspring follow them in Faith, –
to them shall We join their offspring, and We shall not decrease the reward
of their deeds in anything. Every person is a pledge for that which he has earned.
[al-Toor 52:21]

As regards your question about what you can do for your father
and your son who have passed away, you will find a detailed and comprehensive
answer under # 763, which describes things which
the living can do for the benefit of the dead.

Finally, we console you with the words with which the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) consoled
a mother whose son had died:

To Allaah belongs whatever He takes and whatever He gives. Everything
has an appointed time with Him. Have patience and hope of a reward from Him.
(Reported by al-Bukhaari, no. 6829). May Allaah
bless our Prophet Muhammad.


Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

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