Opening the grave and scattering seeds in it

This is an innovation (bid’ah) for which there
is no basis in sharee’ah. Throwing seeds, perfume and clothes into the grave are all reprehensible actions for which there is no basis. The grave
should not be opened unless there is a good reason for doing so, such as the workers forgetting their tools like shovels, so it may be opened for
that reason, or if one of them has dropped something important, so the grave may be opened to retrieve it. But opening it to scatter seeds or
clothes and the like is not permitted. 

Women should not visit graves, because the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed women who visit graves. That was narrated from Abu Hurayrah, Ibn ‘Abbaas and
Hassaan ibn Thaabit (may Allaah be pleased with them). So it is not permissible for them to visit graves, but that is prescribed for men, because
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Visit the graves, for they remind you of the Hereafter.” (Narrated by Muslim
in his Saheeh). 

The reason why women are forbidden to visit
graves – and Allaah knows best – is that they are a temptation (fitnah) and they have little patience.